The past week has been pretty blah-ohhh with my back hurting, and this stupid heat, and my random surprise ticket today, so I think I need a list of things that don't stink.
Here goes:
* The New Kid waves hi, and does this lip-smacking mouth thing almost every time you look at him, and I love the crap out of it.
* Dizzy has been saying words during the day, and it is so freaking exciting. Today, I was giving the New Kid his bottle, and Dizzy said, "YUM!" This may not seem like much to most people, but for three years the only kid talk in this house has been repeated, and not on its own, for the most part.
* Baduka has had great school days. His teacher told me he even had a dance party, with his friend, during choice time the other day. She says there's a video, but that remains to be seen.
* Me and Daddy have lived together for 4 years and 1 day today. He says he's not sick of me yet either!
* The dirty laundry pile is way smaller than the clean. That's a big deal.
Well, not the longest, most exciting list, but at least it's something.
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Friday, May 17, 2013
Huh, what?
Autism is confusing. Having a regular kid is hard enough, but one with the added bonus of autism, makes you really wonder what you're doing ALL THE TIME.
There's books, and websites, and therapies, and diets, and phone calls you have to make, like yesterday. When Baduka was in Early Intervention, it didn't seem that hard, because I asked his case worker all the questions, and he magically had the answers. It was a great system. Then Baduka just had to turn 3, and I'm on my own. I hate the phone. No one answers emails. I would text someone, but apparently that's not acceptable. Autism diagnoses should come with a fairy godmother. The doctor writes a prescription, you click your heels 3 times, and the fairy godmother appears, to make all the coffee and drinks you need to get through some days, and make the phone calls, and answer the questions you have.
And my questions are just ridiculous ones, because I don't even know what kind of questions I'm supposed to be asking. So mine are:
"How do I make him stop pushing Dizzy?" The answer isn't, put him in his room, with an open window, like I did yesterday. Because he will climb through his screen and land in his sandbox.
"How do I make him stop chewing food, then dropping it out of his mouth, onto the floor?" Because, yes the dog enjoys it, but it's gross and super annoying.
"How do I actually use a communication book with him?" Because I've cut, laminated, and velcroed, but really? Now what?
Or these:
"Why does he smash poop into the floor?"
"Why does he hate storage options, such as, tables, shelves, closets, and cabinets?"
"Why does he need all the lights on?" We aren't married to Edison, as my Nana used to say.
"Why does he only like to hold candy til it melts?"
"Why does he have to slam all doors closed?"
"Why does he hide in the closet to eat things?" I get that it's not completely normal to steal cheese out of the fridge, and eat half a pound of it, but hiding in the closet, just looks even more suspicious.
For the most part, Baduka is just like Dizzy and the New Kid, this has just been a long week of phone calls, and "why are you doing thats?!"
I need a nap.
And my questions are just ridiculous ones, because I don't even know what kind of questions I'm supposed to be asking. So mine are:
"How do I make him stop pushing Dizzy?" The answer isn't, put him in his room, with an open window, like I did yesterday. Because he will climb through his screen and land in his sandbox.
"How do I make him stop chewing food, then dropping it out of his mouth, onto the floor?" Because, yes the dog enjoys it, but it's gross and super annoying.
"How do I actually use a communication book with him?" Because I've cut, laminated, and velcroed, but really? Now what?
Or these:
"Why does he smash poop into the floor?"
"Why does he hate storage options, such as, tables, shelves, closets, and cabinets?"
"Why does he need all the lights on?" We aren't married to Edison, as my Nana used to say.
"Why does he only like to hold candy til it melts?"
"Why does he have to slam all doors closed?"
"Why does he hide in the closet to eat things?" I get that it's not completely normal to steal cheese out of the fridge, and eat half a pound of it, but hiding in the closet, just looks even more suspicious.
For the most part, Baduka is just like Dizzy and the New Kid, this has just been a long week of phone calls, and "why are you doing thats?!"
I need a nap.
Monday, May 13, 2013
wake up late, make new friends
My phone has one volume for all the things in it- ringer, texts, games, THE ALARM CLOCK, etc. So this morning, we were late because I turned it wayyy down to play Bubble Star last night, and that music is annoying. Like, up with 15 minutes til I like to get in the car, kinda late. Got Baduka up, got pancakes in the microwave, lunch made, cups washed, a bottle made, and Baduka dressed within 10 minutes. All that I usually accomplish in an hour, I work better in a panic, I guess.
Pancakes and a bottle were eaten in the car. Dizzy was woken up at the last possible second, so he still probably has no idea what happened.
Of course, we got to school before almost everyone else. There was one school van sitting at the sidewalk. And a mom with her two kids in the yard part in front of the door. They were chasing each other and playing tag. Usually I have a firm grip on Baduka's hand, while we wait for his teacher to come out, and I have been letting go only for him to sit on the bench with his class. Today he was so excited to see the kids running around, that I let him run too.
It was nice to be able to chat with another mom with a kid on the spectrum, one who knows what I'm just starting to go through with school. Her son is a little bit older and her daughter is a "regular" kid. I liked seeing how well those two got along, it gave me hope that the best boys will eventually like each other too. That hopefully the pushing and face shoves can just be called Tag.
Baduka went into school, ready to learn with grass stained knees, a bumped head, and a pancake in each hand. I went home smiling, while remembering his backpack bobbing, a pancake in each hand, laughing and giggling, because I'm learning to let him be a "regular" kid.
Pancakes and a bottle were eaten in the car. Dizzy was woken up at the last possible second, so he still probably has no idea what happened.
Of course, we got to school before almost everyone else. There was one school van sitting at the sidewalk. And a mom with her two kids in the yard part in front of the door. They were chasing each other and playing tag. Usually I have a firm grip on Baduka's hand, while we wait for his teacher to come out, and I have been letting go only for him to sit on the bench with his class. Today he was so excited to see the kids running around, that I let him run too.
It was nice to be able to chat with another mom with a kid on the spectrum, one who knows what I'm just starting to go through with school. Her son is a little bit older and her daughter is a "regular" kid. I liked seeing how well those two got along, it gave me hope that the best boys will eventually like each other too. That hopefully the pushing and face shoves can just be called Tag.
Baduka went into school, ready to learn with grass stained knees, a bumped head, and a pancake in each hand. I went home smiling, while remembering his backpack bobbing, a pancake in each hand, laughing and giggling, because I'm learning to let him be a "regular" kid.
Friday, May 10, 2013
Dizzy, Dizzy, Dizzy
Today Dizzy has definitely lived up to his nickname. He has been crazy since we dropped off Baduka at school.
It started off with him stealing the New Kid's pancakes, then stealing my waffle. It was pretty upsetting since it was the last Coconut Chocolate Chip one from the freezer, and we are out of coconut.
Then, he kept launching his chocolate covered face at my thigh in a 32 pound hug, and let's be serious, I'm probably not changing these pants before we go back to pick up Baduka.
Then, I found him in the laundry closet, helping. He helped by putting everything on top of the dryer into the dryer. Awesome.
Then, he pooped his pants and made me chase him down to change him, which is exactly what I wanted to do. I needed the exercise.
But so far, the highlight of the morning was just now, when I went to see why he was so quiet. He was sitting on his hippo chair, surrounded by books, quietly eating a crayon, after coloring his foot blue.
Coffee, please? Unless you have rum?
It started off with him stealing the New Kid's pancakes, then stealing my waffle. It was pretty upsetting since it was the last Coconut Chocolate Chip one from the freezer, and we are out of coconut.
Then, he kept launching his chocolate covered face at my thigh in a 32 pound hug, and let's be serious, I'm probably not changing these pants before we go back to pick up Baduka.
Then, I found him in the laundry closet, helping. He helped by putting everything on top of the dryer into the dryer. Awesome.
Then, he pooped his pants and made me chase him down to change him, which is exactly what I wanted to do. I needed the exercise.
But so far, the highlight of the morning was just now, when I went to see why he was so quiet. He was sitting on his hippo chair, surrounded by books, quietly eating a crayon, after coloring his foot blue.
Coffee, please? Unless you have rum?
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
My favorite mom
With Sunday being Mother's Day, I want to tell you about my mom. Growing up she was always pretty easy to get along with, as long as you let her sleep, didn't touch her Pepsi (she outgrew that,) brought her home a coffee, and didn't mind answering the same questions about where you were going over and over. I swear I would tell her I'm going to CVS, go to my room for something, come back, and again tell her I was going to CVS. But she always said, "Be good. Have fun. I love you," no matter where I was going. She is the best Christmas stocking and Easter basket stuffer, ever. Seriously, it still boggles my mind how she gets it all in there.
But it took me having kids to see how truly awesome she really is. She has 5 grandsons, as of this moment, and she treats them like they are the only kids on Earth. I bet if they all talked, and you asked each one who Nana's favorite is, they would all answer "ME!" She spoils them all equally, but it's the way she has treated Baduka's diagnosis that makes me love her even more.
Most blogs by parents of autistic children always complain that the grandparents and other people just don't support them, which just makes a crappy situation even worse. Not my mom. Since the day I told her I thought he had autism, she has ordered books, toys, posters, puzzles and games for him. Amazon must love her. She filled her sandbox with dried rice, instead of sand, because he likes it better. She let's him rearrange her house, because he doesn't like change. She is always crying at his achievements, always his cheerleader.
Last week, I told her I wanted to make him a PECS book, and she googled and amazoned, and the next day, texted that she had ordered him a set of communication picture cards. When I thanked her through my tears, she said, "Don't make me cry, I just want what's best for my grandsons, I just try to make it easier for you and (Daddy), I love those little boys and will do everything I can." They came in today, and she said they also make a set of sign language cards that she was thinking of ordering. I told her she didn't need to do that. Her response? "I want to, I've been wanting to learn it too. There's a guy at work who's deaf and I try to understand him."
Not only is she trying to make life easier for us, she is also thinking of people she works with. Which shouldn't surprise me, she has invited a few coworkers home for Thanksgiving and Christmas for the past few years, because they don't have anywhere to go. It amazes me how amazing she is.
Lots of people don't want to end up like their mothers, I hope everyday that I do.
But it took me having kids to see how truly awesome she really is. She has 5 grandsons, as of this moment, and she treats them like they are the only kids on Earth. I bet if they all talked, and you asked each one who Nana's favorite is, they would all answer "ME!" She spoils them all equally, but it's the way she has treated Baduka's diagnosis that makes me love her even more.
Most blogs by parents of autistic children always complain that the grandparents and other people just don't support them, which just makes a crappy situation even worse. Not my mom. Since the day I told her I thought he had autism, she has ordered books, toys, posters, puzzles and games for him. Amazon must love her. She filled her sandbox with dried rice, instead of sand, because he likes it better. She let's him rearrange her house, because he doesn't like change. She is always crying at his achievements, always his cheerleader.
Last week, I told her I wanted to make him a PECS book, and she googled and amazoned, and the next day, texted that she had ordered him a set of communication picture cards. When I thanked her through my tears, she said, "Don't make me cry, I just want what's best for my grandsons, I just try to make it easier for you and (Daddy), I love those little boys and will do everything I can." They came in today, and she said they also make a set of sign language cards that she was thinking of ordering. I told her she didn't need to do that. Her response? "I want to, I've been wanting to learn it too. There's a guy at work who's deaf and I try to understand him."
Not only is she trying to make life easier for us, she is also thinking of people she works with. Which shouldn't surprise me, she has invited a few coworkers home for Thanksgiving and Christmas for the past few years, because they don't have anywhere to go. It amazes me how amazing she is.
Lots of people don't want to end up like their mothers, I hope everyday that I do.
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Brothers Annoying and Obnoxious McCrazypants
These maniacs took their extra dose of "Let's Do Everything That Makes Her Crazy" pills today.
Both Baduka and Dizzy, have decided to do whatever they can to make me wish Daddy were home, but he's at a bowling thing, with awards, and drinking. LUCKY HIM!
While he is off doing that, I have the pleasure of picking everything up off the floor, repeatedly. Why must they clean the kitchen table by messing up the kitchen floor? Is it to make standing on the table eating easier? Because that's how Dizzy eats every meal.
Oh, and why did Dizzy just put 3 water bottles in the toaster oven? Why did Baduka turn it on first? Seriously, that ticking timer is constant kitchen background noise.
Why does Baduka insist on standing on anything he can, to get closer to the TV? ESPECIALLY after last week's super successful attempt at scaling Mount Dresser?! The kid took the entire thing down and still goes back for more, while I'm still shaking.
What is their obsession with the bathroom? If our hot water didn't come out at the temperature, Surface of the Sun, I wouldn't care that they wanted to wash their hands 452 times a day, but being on constant you're gonna burn yourself, thats hot,hot,hot watch is exhausting. Especially, when the only warning that they think their hands are dirty is the click of the door being closed, and the toilet seat being slammed down. And there is almost always a toilet paper roll soaking in the toilet.
They have been off the walls crazy, but at least the New Kid is napping. He can be my favorite today.
Both Baduka and Dizzy, have decided to do whatever they can to make me wish Daddy were home, but he's at a bowling thing, with awards, and drinking. LUCKY HIM!
While he is off doing that, I have the pleasure of picking everything up off the floor, repeatedly. Why must they clean the kitchen table by messing up the kitchen floor? Is it to make standing on the table eating easier? Because that's how Dizzy eats every meal.
Oh, and why did Dizzy just put 3 water bottles in the toaster oven? Why did Baduka turn it on first? Seriously, that ticking timer is constant kitchen background noise.
Why does Baduka insist on standing on anything he can, to get closer to the TV? ESPECIALLY after last week's super successful attempt at scaling Mount Dresser?! The kid took the entire thing down and still goes back for more, while I'm still shaking.
What is their obsession with the bathroom? If our hot water didn't come out at the temperature, Surface of the Sun, I wouldn't care that they wanted to wash their hands 452 times a day, but being on constant you're gonna burn yourself, thats hot,hot,hot watch is exhausting. Especially, when the only warning that they think their hands are dirty is the click of the door being closed, and the toilet seat being slammed down. And there is almost always a toilet paper roll soaking in the toilet.
They have been off the walls crazy, but at least the New Kid is napping. He can be my favorite today.
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
short stories
Just a few things from this week...
* Monday was the first day me, Dizzy, and the New Kid walked to pick Baduka up from school. I completely misjudged the time it would take to walk a mile, so yup, I was the creepy mom watching recess outside the gate. I'm not sure why I thought I needed an hour and a half, and then was shocked to get there in 22 minutes. It was kinda nice to see him running around though.
* His teacher says he has great days, and it has been an easy transition, and I crave more details. Thats normal, right? I wanna grab her and be like, "Listen, lady, I take him home and he smells like your perfume til tubby time, so you tell me EXACTLY every detail of his day. How many bites of lunch was it?!" But I'm trying to downplay the crazy, so I just smile and say non-creeptastic things, like "Thanks!" and "He's awesome!" and "See you tomorrow!"
* I'm pretty sure Dizzy had his first official panic attack, and it was definitely my fault. I put him and the New Kid in the stroller, then realized the car was parked in my way of getting out of the driveway, so I got in and started the car to move it up a few feet, while waving and saying, "Bye! See ya later!" He instantly burst into tears. Hopefully, he headbutts that memory right out of his giant head.
* The New Kid has been on the move. He is an army crawling pro and I'm just hoping he never learns the sport of climbing the walls. Two monkeys are enough.
* Potty training is too hard and I want to give it up. Baduka knows the how, but the why, when, and where is still a little difficult for him to understand. But since he insists Naked is AWESOME, I'm saving diapers, but wasting paper towels, wiping pee from every floor in the house. They make adult diapers for a reason, right?
Well, my coffee cup is empty, and it's suspiciously quiet in the other room, time to check and see if my dream of Family Naptime came true... Fingers crossed!
* Monday was the first day me, Dizzy, and the New Kid walked to pick Baduka up from school. I completely misjudged the time it would take to walk a mile, so yup, I was the creepy mom watching recess outside the gate. I'm not sure why I thought I needed an hour and a half, and then was shocked to get there in 22 minutes. It was kinda nice to see him running around though.
* His teacher says he has great days, and it has been an easy transition, and I crave more details. Thats normal, right? I wanna grab her and be like, "Listen, lady, I take him home and he smells like your perfume til tubby time, so you tell me EXACTLY every detail of his day. How many bites of lunch was it?!" But I'm trying to downplay the crazy, so I just smile and say non-creeptastic things, like "Thanks!" and "He's awesome!" and "See you tomorrow!"
* I'm pretty sure Dizzy had his first official panic attack, and it was definitely my fault. I put him and the New Kid in the stroller, then realized the car was parked in my way of getting out of the driveway, so I got in and started the car to move it up a few feet, while waving and saying, "Bye! See ya later!" He instantly burst into tears. Hopefully, he headbutts that memory right out of his giant head.
* The New Kid has been on the move. He is an army crawling pro and I'm just hoping he never learns the sport of climbing the walls. Two monkeys are enough.
* Potty training is too hard and I want to give it up. Baduka knows the how, but the why, when, and where is still a little difficult for him to understand. But since he insists Naked is AWESOME, I'm saving diapers, but wasting paper towels, wiping pee from every floor in the house. They make adult diapers for a reason, right?
Well, my coffee cup is empty, and it's suspiciously quiet in the other room, time to check and see if my dream of Family Naptime came true... Fingers crossed!
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